Starfish Songwriters
The Sandbox => MP3 songs for Review/Critique => Topic started by: Jhershey on March 27, 2026, 10:44:33 pm
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I like the guitar/vocal track, nice and simple.
Cute hook about calling 911, but it seems like the verses just re-state the same thing.
There needs to be a twist in the bridge or something to make the listener say "dang, didn't see that comin".
If I already know how the song is gonna end, it's not very satisfying.
Why are all the reasons people call 911?? I can't breathe, my heart is pounding, can you send someone, how long will it take, please don't hang up....................
What are real things people say when they are in a panic? Then relate it back to your story, maybe?
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Thanks, I must have missed them on Soundcloud.
I'll take another listen.
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Done. I had debated posting the lyrics because they are on the Soundcloud posting.
But from now on I shall also post them here!
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Hay Jessica,
This sounds good. If you don't mind would you post the lyrics, I like to read along as I listen.
Good Job.
Good Luck.
Tex
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Hey all. I have been working with SUNO for a bit on my songs. Have discovered that there are many tricks to the prompting. But I have finally discovered one that can 100% duplicate a guitar/vocal work tape in the same way I would get it back from a demo studio. This is my latest, CALL 911. Melody and Lyrics by me.
https://on.soundcloud.com/Yn1M4GstB4lkK8DZd9 (https://on.soundcloud.com/Yn1M4GstB4lkK8DZd9)
[Verse 1]
Phone's ringing, couldn't believe
Name I was seeing on the caller ID
We were finished and it was done
Let it go to voicemail, listen later on
[Chorus]
Call 911, I'm having a heart attack
Call 911, baby says she wants me back
Well, she says she's missing all the fun
Sorry she ever said we were done
It's a modern day miracle, son
Call 911
[Verse 2]
Said hey bar keep hit me again
I need some advice you seem like a good friend
Am I sweatin' how's my pulse
Listen to this message are these the results
[Chorus]
Call 911, I'm having a heart attack
Call 911, baby says she wants me back
Well, she says she's missing all the fun
Sorry she ever said we were done
It's a modern day miracle, son
Call 911
[Bridge]
I hope I live long enough
To look back in those eyes
I might need EMS
Shocked by this surprise
[Chorus]
Call 911, I'm having a heart attack
Call 911, baby says she wants me back
Well, she says she's missing all the fun
Sorry she ever said we were done
It's a modern day miracle, son
Call 911
[Outro]
Call 911
Call 911